The Struggle is Real

So all my life I have been shy, and this year I decided to attempt to come out of that shell. For many reasons, I wanted to begin to crack that shell open. Reason 1 I am a blogger and to get my name out there, I need to talk to people and communicate. giphy2

On the blogging part, it is going AMAZING. I have met so many bomb ass bloggers, and they are amazing! Now the other reason was that I wanted to get out there and decide to date finally, EPIC FAIL I am struggling. Lord knows I am trying, but I must keep pushing myself because my thoughts alone will be the reason I end up being the cat lady.


In November/December, I was struggling with my anxiety, and depression HARD spoke about this in one of my previous blog post it was so bad that I decided to talk to someone about it. It helped a lot, and it made me crack the shell even more.

Ever since I could remember I hated being around large crowds of people unless you were friends or family. Even that didn’t go well because I would end up in a room by myself or some shit.


Now dating with anxiety has to be one of the toughest things I have endured. Yeah, I’ve dated guys, but they end up being fuck boys, so I drop them quicker than a toddler running to use the bathroom cause they been holding their pee for 30 minutes.giphy5

So I thought I’d post some tips to help overcome the anxiety struggle that a lot of men & women have.

The shit is hard, and I know it all to well from personal experience. Out in public I always have this RBF (resting bitch face) because I don’t want to be bothered. It’s the complete opposite if you struggle with shit you completely understand. People think you’re mean, stuck up, an asshole the list goes on and on.

So here are a few things that people should be prepared for when dating someone with anxiety:

  1. Look it up! So you’re dating a guy or a girl, and he/she tells you ” Oh I struggle with anxiety, and I need you to be completely patient with me as we are dating over whatever this may be.” Understand that if you like him/her, you cannot be there for them if you do not understand what they are struggling with. SO PLEASE READ UP ON IT because they can have a panic attack and you wouldn’t know what to do.
  2. Listen to them. Yeah, they may be rambling on and on about something COMPLETELY POINTLESS, but they may feel important if you are just there. I struggle with this because I don’t tell people I have it and a choose not to take the medicine to ease it.
  3. Don’t fear a person with anxiety’s emotions. At times I have gotten extremely overwhelmed with anxiety, and I cry for no reason or get extremely angry. Know that it’s not your fault and that person is struggling to grasp everything and put it back together. Patience is the most important thing that comes along with dating a person with anxiety it’s a requirement. If you don’t want to deal with it be straight up and honest with that person.
  4. Anxiety is normal people have it. It’s not made up in the black community we think so many things are made up when they are not. Anxiety isn’t something you can just fix, yeah they have medicine for it, but that medicine isn’t for everyone.

If I go on this post would be a good 45-minute read, so I thought I’d give you a few tips. I hope this helps with anyone you know that has anxiety life myself. It’s going to be hard, awkward, and sometimes unpredictable. But if you are interested in that person, maybe this will help you understand.

P.S. Ladies, I have my first giveaway coming, and you don’t want to miss it. Details will be posted on my Instagram very soon. Love you all *insert here emoji here*

11 thoughts on “The Struggle is Real

  1. Dealing with anxiety not only within myself but other people I can say that these are all very important tips. The first one is a very important one. There are stereotypes about different mental illnesses, and a lot of people try to understand it through a stereotype instead of reading about it and learning about it. Anxiety is so common but comes in many forms. Understanding the core aspect of it can really be helpful. Thanks for sharing!

    • Yes I truly agree, people think because you have mental health issues you are automatically “crazy”, but it’s not true. When you take the time to sit down and listen and understand the person you get the know them and how they deal with their issues.

  2. Love your post as i struggle with anxiety and depression a lot. The tips you gave are amazing and very beneficial for those dating people with this problem. Understanding what you(they) are dealing with is very important and will be helpful along the way. We are not crazy, we are human beings with a disorder. That’s all. Thanks for sharing!

  3. This is some realness right here! I’m glad you spoke out on anxiety. We don’t do that enough in our community so it is always refreshing when someone does.

    • Thank you and you are so right! If it involves mental health we are just “crazy”, but it’s way more to it. I literally had a panic attack a few days ago and I haven’t had one in years. Mental Health is important!

  4. Thank you for being so honest! I truly understand the struggle to be more social.. it is hard! My anxiety takes over and I just shut down sometimes. Thank you for the great tips! Take care!

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